It's been a bit quiet around here lately hasn't it? (tumbleweed blows by).

I've been wanting to get back into blogging but wasn't sure where to start - but I'm still getting some traffic to this page from some of my pins so obviously someone out there is still reading this so I think it may just be the right time for a comeback.

We also have a tiny announcement which may just be the motivation I need to get back into blogging. I'll let my first born monster tell you the news.

See you next time!

*****Quick apology - Sorry its been a while since my last post, things have been very hectic as my grandmother is seriously ill and in hospital (it's not looking good) and blogging has been a low priority for me. I hope to be back on a regular blogging schedule again soon but until our family situation has stabilised, blogging is taking a bit of a back seat right now*****


A friend at work announced her second pregnancy the other week. I was pleased for her but it felt very strange to me in a way, because the last time she was pregnant, I was pregnant too. In fact we were 'pregnancy buddies' during my first pregnancy, and whilst she was 3 weeks ahead of me it felt really nice to have someone to experience pregnancy with who was going through exactly the same things as me.

We shared all our experiences from around 10-13 weeks, swapped scan photos, related experiences with midwifes, doctors etc. Discussed pushchairs, cots, toys, feeding plans - everything and anything and would regularly spend lunch together talking 'baby'.We also discussed our concerns, our aches and pains, weird feelings, embarrassing symptoms and also the extra appointments, the consultant referrals (interestingly she was being checked as her baby was showing in scans as too small and then late in my pregnancy my baby appeared to be too big and had to have extra scans). Coincidently we were also both having boys and it was the first child for both of us so all of these things combined bonded us together and it was nice to feel I wasn't alone.

I had other friends who had had babies, my mum, mother in law and other family and friends to talk to of course and also read the online forums and joined online 'birth clubs' but speaking to someone in person who was actually going through the same things at almost exactly the same time was lovely and I'm really glad that I had that.

Our babies were subsequently born a few weeks apart (hers naturally, mine by emergency c-section) and we both had issues feeding and so both babies were formula fed and this was something else we shared together. But only a few months later after the babies were born, our need to share and relate with each other seemed to reduce. I don't know if it was because we were sharing with new friends at post natal groups, had relatively 'easy' babies or if it was just the distance (I live an hour from her and would rarely leave my town during my maternity leave due to fuel costs) but we stopped texting and meeting up with each other and drifted apart.

I hoped things would change when we returned to work but our part time hours were the opposite to each other with only a one day overlap and we never really got that connection back and although friends we weren't so close and I found it harder to talk to her other than to make basic small talk.

When she announced her second pregnancy the other day my feelings were mixed, I was thrilled for her but I also felt a bit jealous to be honest as I would like to have another baby but we are not in a position to consider another child at the moment. I also felt a bit sad that I would not be able to share the experience with her like I had the first time around.

I guess its also brought into focus the second baby question- 'When should we have another child?' CK is almost 2, are we being selfish by waiting as I know he'd love a brother or sister, will conception of another child be as simple as it was the first time? If I did fall pregnant how would we cope financially and in terms of space (we live in a small 2 bed house)? My health hasn't been good either and I am still a stone heavier than I was pre-pregnancy.

Several of my friends are onto their second babies and I'll admit to feeling broody at the moment with this recent second round of babies. I know that this is not a reason to have a baby but sometimes I feel it adds to the pressure as I feel like maybe I should be having another baby too.

Can anyone relate to my experiences and how have you dealt with the 'second baby' question? Please let me know in the comments below

Did anyone see that article on the Daily Mail's website this week about the celebrity bumps ? I have to say it really struck a chord with me as it reminded me of my own pregnancy due to the shape of my own bump. You see when I was pregnant I had a B shaped bump and didn't even 'look' pregnant until I was half way through my last trimester and even then I didn't feel particularly big.

Expectations

As this was my first pregnancy I had no idea what to expect for most aspects of pregnancy, but one thing I was expecting (other than a baby) was the classic shaped large D bump. It felt like everyone I'd ever known, seen in magazines or come across in the supermarket or doctors had that D shaped bump and I naturally assumed I'd get one too, but I didn't. (I couldn't even find an attribution free B Bump image online for this blog post)

My B Bump

When my bump started growing it grew high up in my 'midriff area' - an area where I had never had any padding before. I've always had a bit of a belly under and around my belly button and I assumed that this would be the area that would get bigger and I wasn't too concerned about it getting bigger either, so I found it odd to find that I was growing an upper belly too. Worse still there was a part of my belly than didn't seem to be growing, it was almost like I had an elastic band around my belly button and everything above or below it was growing but that band wasn't growing as much.

Body Conscious

I wasn't the only person in my office who was pregnant at that time and another lady of smaller stature and body shape was a few weeks ahead of me in her pregnancy. It was difficult not to make comparisons, her bump showed up very quickly and was a very neat round shape bump, whilst I looked like I was carrying 2 spare tyres. I couldn't help being a bit envious of my friend with her beautiful bump. As my pregnancy progressed I found it difficult to find maternity clothes that flattered my B bump and didn't feel able to wear anything that highlighted my bump so I wore mostly flared tops and tunics over leggings and jeans.

Hiding from view

I also hid from the camera - I don't have a single picture of my baby bump only a few shots of my upper body. Even now 19 months on after giving birth, I look at photo's of pregnant ladies posting their bump progress week on week on Facebook accounts on blogs and feel sad that I never had a bump like that to have proudly shown off.

Why did I have a B shaped Bump?

I did ask my midwife at one of my appointments about the shape of my bump and she told me it was something to do with the tightness of my tummy muscles (whether there's any truth in that I don't know) and that I would get a D Shape, but that never happened. Having done some reading since, I think it is most likely down to my body shape, I am very tall and have an hour glass, plus size shape and I guess my baby had more than enough space in my body throughout most of my pregnancy meaning he didn't need to protrude much until the later stages. I also didn't gain much weight during my pregnancy (just after) and I put on just over a stone (excluding weight of baby) so that probably made a difference too. Another factor could have been CK's position - he was never the right way round and was back to back throughout most of the appointments and scans. My midwife thought in late pregnancy he was the right way round, but when I actually went into labour he turned out to be breach and lying in a transverse (horizontal) position so I had a C section (you can read my full birth story here),

Post Pregnancy

After CK was born I put on well over another stone whilst on maternity leave and whilst I have lost that since going back to work in September, I still am around one and a half stone heavier than I was before my pregnancy. I haven't lost my B shape or that tight band around my belly button either and now have an upper and lower belly - the C Section probably didn't help either. This is my post B shape pregnancy belly as it is now, you can even see the tight band running around from my belly button. (please ignore the mirror screw lol)

The future

CD and I would like to have more children and I do wonder what shape my bump will be next time. I hope that I am more accepting if it is a B bump and if it is I hope to celebrate this fact more and will try to document my growing bump when the time comes.

What was your bump shape? - Did you ever have bump envy during pregnancy? Let me know in the comments below.