We recently made a new discovery - the most amazing children's playground I've ever seen - and it is less than 10 minutes drive from my house. It's located in a small village near where my mother in law lives which is how I first became aware of it, but behind the hedgerow I had no idea of the full extent of it.

We always used to go to a playground in our little town, it is pretty good with swings, a climbing frame with slide, seesaw and merry go round - but its pretty much like every other playground in the area - as if the county council has a blueprint for playground and creates them all as more or less in the same image. It is quite small and is always busy so you quite often had to queue to go on the equipment - particularly the 2 swings.

One day, I decided to go and take a look at the new playground with Cotswold Kid. I knew they had a big slide, swings and a play frame with slide but when we finally went in and had a proper look around I was surprised by the amount and quality of the play equipment.

Park Play equipment:

2 x baby swings
2 x standard swings
Basket swing
3x climbing frames 1 for toddlers, one for slightly older children, and a much taller one for older children
3x 'rockers' including the horse pictured above
Monkey bars
Obstacle course (logs to climb on etc)
small playhouse/shelter
an angled 'wheel' that turns as you walk on it
2 large xylophones (1 of wood, 1 with metal tubes)
3 small 'stepping stone' style platforms that make different sounds when you step on them
1 very large sandpit (gated and elevated to try and prevent cats etc getting in) full of old buckets and spades etc.
Skateboard style board on springs

There are picnic tables too and we have had at least one picnic there so far and if the weather remains nice we may have more.

All equipment is well maintained, the grass is kept neat and trimmed - the whole park is maintained by the local village community and the flowers are regularly weeded etc.

It's so beautiful and there is a huge football field so Cotswold Kid can run wild as as he can't get onto the road without going through a gate which puts my mind at risk.

The other day after passing a happy hour here it was time to leave. I told CK we were going 'home' a word that he now recognises. His face fell, he shook his head and refused point blank to leave throwing a huge tantrum and I basically had to drag him out.

I can understand why he didn't want to go, after all it is probably the best playground I've ever known - I certainly don't remember anything anywhere near as good when I was a child.

I don't want to say where this place is - it's so quiet and lovely and I know that sometimes when playgrounds have makeovers they get very busy and I like not having to queue to use equipment.

Do you have anywhere like this where you like to go? Maybe you have a special memory of somewhere like this from when you were a child and you still take your kids there now all these years later. Please let me know in the comments below.

Did anyone see that article on the Daily Mail's website this week about the celebrity bumps ? I have to say it really struck a chord with me as it reminded me of my own pregnancy due to the shape of my own bump. You see when I was pregnant I had a B shaped bump and didn't even 'look' pregnant until I was half way through my last trimester and even then I didn't feel particularly big.

Expectations

As this was my first pregnancy I had no idea what to expect for most aspects of pregnancy, but one thing I was expecting (other than a baby) was the classic shaped large D bump. It felt like everyone I'd ever known, seen in magazines or come across in the supermarket or doctors had that D shaped bump and I naturally assumed I'd get one too, but I didn't. (I couldn't even find an attribution free B Bump image online for this blog post)

My B Bump

When my bump started growing it grew high up in my 'midriff area' - an area where I had never had any padding before. I've always had a bit of a belly under and around my belly button and I assumed that this would be the area that would get bigger and I wasn't too concerned about it getting bigger either, so I found it odd to find that I was growing an upper belly too. Worse still there was a part of my belly than didn't seem to be growing, it was almost like I had an elastic band around my belly button and everything above or below it was growing but that band wasn't growing as much.

Body Conscious

I wasn't the only person in my office who was pregnant at that time and another lady of smaller stature and body shape was a few weeks ahead of me in her pregnancy. It was difficult not to make comparisons, her bump showed up very quickly and was a very neat round shape bump, whilst I looked like I was carrying 2 spare tyres. I couldn't help being a bit envious of my friend with her beautiful bump. As my pregnancy progressed I found it difficult to find maternity clothes that flattered my B bump and didn't feel able to wear anything that highlighted my bump so I wore mostly flared tops and tunics over leggings and jeans.

Hiding from view

I also hid from the camera - I don't have a single picture of my baby bump only a few shots of my upper body. Even now 19 months on after giving birth, I look at photo's of pregnant ladies posting their bump progress week on week on Facebook accounts on blogs and feel sad that I never had a bump like that to have proudly shown off.

Why did I have a B shaped Bump?

I did ask my midwife at one of my appointments about the shape of my bump and she told me it was something to do with the tightness of my tummy muscles (whether there's any truth in that I don't know) and that I would get a D Shape, but that never happened. Having done some reading since, I think it is most likely down to my body shape, I am very tall and have an hour glass, plus size shape and I guess my baby had more than enough space in my body throughout most of my pregnancy meaning he didn't need to protrude much until the later stages. I also didn't gain much weight during my pregnancy (just after) and I put on just over a stone (excluding weight of baby) so that probably made a difference too. Another factor could have been CK's position - he was never the right way round and was back to back throughout most of the appointments and scans. My midwife thought in late pregnancy he was the right way round, but when I actually went into labour he turned out to be breach and lying in a transverse (horizontal) position so I had a C section (you can read my full birth story here),

Post Pregnancy

After CK was born I put on well over another stone whilst on maternity leave and whilst I have lost that since going back to work in September, I still am around one and a half stone heavier than I was before my pregnancy. I haven't lost my B shape or that tight band around my belly button either and now have an upper and lower belly - the C Section probably didn't help either. This is my post B shape pregnancy belly as it is now, you can even see the tight band running around from my belly button. (please ignore the mirror screw lol)

The future

CD and I would like to have more children and I do wonder what shape my bump will be next time. I hope that I am more accepting if it is a B bump and if it is I hope to celebrate this fact more and will try to document my growing bump when the time comes.

What was your bump shape? - Did you ever have bump envy during pregnancy? Let me know in the comments below.

You may have seen the other day that I posted that we'd broken our cold water steriliser. We took it with us to Center Parcs but when we unloaded the car on arrival it fell out when we opened the boot and cracked when it hit the pavement but you might be wondering why I still sterilise considering CK is 19 months. Well actually we have a few reasons.

We've always used cold water sterilising with the Milton method since CK was born. Even during the early days in hospital when he was readmitted to hospital due to weightloss and went on formula for the first time, his bottles were sterilised in a large cold water bucket. When we returned home we used a steriliser which my mum and dad passed onto me which they bought from Boots in the 1980s and used for both myself and my sister.

We continued to use the original steriliser for the first 19 months, and after seeing the Milton tablets in the shops I decided to go for those over the supermarket ones as the price difference seemed fairly minimal between own brand and Milton. The steriliser was so easy to use too - the water was changed daily whilst cooking the dinner and a tablet tossed in along with bottles, teat's, dummies and on one occasion even a toothbrush!

Of course then the steriliser got broken and we had to decide whether to take the opportunity to stop sterilising altogether or to replace the steriliser and carry on. We decided to go ahead and replace the steriliser.

So why buy a new steriliser?

1. Habit - we have gotten into the habit of washing the bottles and automatically putting them in the steriliser

2. Laziness and lack of space - If we don't put them in the steriliser where will we keep them and also it's easier to carry on using the steriliser.

3. Not wanting to change routine - CK still has 1 bottle a day at bedtime and drinks out of cups the remainder of the day. We only sterilise the bottles and don't want to stop giving him bottles at night time as it helps send him off to sleep.

4. Cleanliness - Bottles are harder to clean, there are crevices, nooks and crannies on bottles where bacteria can grow if milk residue is not removed, but by sterilising these this ensures the bottles are clean.

5. If we have more babies in the future we will probably use bottles with them whether they are on formula or breastfed, so it made sense to go ahead and just replace the steriliser.

Milton Cold Water Steriliser

When looking at options for replacing our steriliser there did not seem to be many cold water options and a few I looked at also came with bottles which we didn't need. Then I saw the Milton Cold Water steriliser advertised at a competitive price, and also as we used their tablets it seemed like a sensible idea to buy their steriliser as well so I went ahead and bought it.




So that's why we're still sterilising, how long did you sterilise for? Let me know in the comments below.

I am a PCOS Mummy.
I conceived whilst I was overweight and without using any special fertility medication despite being warned by my doctors at diagnosis that it would be more difficult to conceive. Here is my story.

Diagnosis

About 3 months after Cotswold Dad and I started dating in early 2012, I missed a period. I wasn't on the pill at that time and after ruling out pregnancy via a home pregnancy test I decided to go to the doctors to get checked out fully expecting to be told that it was nothing. The doctor wasn't too worried but she sent me for a load of blood tests to make sure that there was nothing serious going on. When I went back for the results there were 2 results of concern, Firstly my LH:FSH (Luteinizing hormone to Follicle Stimulating hormone) ratio was 'abnormal' and secondly my TSH level was slightly elevated (Thyroid Stimulating hormone). 

The LH:FSH Ratio was a concern and when considered alongside other 'symptoms' which I had previously thought to be normal, the doctor suspected that I had Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. I was sent for an internal ultrasound and the sonographer showed me the results - my ovaries had small cysts on, which on the ultrasound looked like a 'string of pearls' around each ovary and she more or less confirmed the PCOS diagnosis but told me not to worry and the doctor would talk to me more.

At this point I did what most others would and do do, I went home and looked on the internet and read many stories about women with the condition who were struggling to conceive, and whilst I was in a new relationship and in no rush to try for a baby, at the back of my mind I was still concerned.

I returned to the doctor and she confirmed the diagnosis, prescribed me the progesterone only pill Cerazette and that was that. I asked about the prognosis regarding my chances of falling pregnant and was told that she didn't know but it was likely to be more difficult and that once I started trying if I didn't conceive I could be referred quicker for additional help than couples without the condition. She told me if I hadn't conceived within 6 months then I should come back.

As I said, we'd only been dating a few months at this point, weren't even living together let alone considering having a baby and so I pushed everything to the back of my mind and just enjoyed my relationship. It was difficult seeing friends and family having babies around me knowing that it might not be so easy for me but I just tried not to think about it and adopted a 'worry about it in the future attitude'.

Symptoms

I do have some of the classic symptoms of PCOS, I suffer from acne on my face and occasionally my back, I have some hair growth on my chin but as I am fair haired and I don't have much growth I am fairly fortunate in this sense, I did suffer unexpected weight gain prior to my diagnosis - more than I had expected but had put this down to job stress and a recent house move (causing worse eating habits), I also have a line of hair on my belly which some sufferers have and the missed periods are also a classic symptom.

'Passively Trying'

In September 2013 I moved in with Cotswold Dad and a few months later we had another talk about 'the baby issue', I wasn't ready then but I felt I soon would be and as I was expecting it to take a few years to conceive and I was in my late 20s and had a family history of fertility problems including early menopause, I didn't want to leave it until it was too late. With Cotswold Dad's support I came off the pill, and whilst we weren't actively trying and changed nothing at all we weren't not trying either if that makes sense. Also shortly before moving in with Cotswold Dad, I lost a little over a stone with weight watchers and zumba and was eating better as I was trying to get my BMI down. Here's a photo of me taken in November 2013 - to give you an idea of what I looked like then. (I wish I looked like this now!)

Me at a fancy dress party as Katy Perry Nov 13

Positive results

I never for one moment expected to get pregnant quickly, and so was fairly relaxed and put no pressure on myself but in March I was suffering from indigestion and constipation (sorry if that's TMI). I considered buying a test but told myself not to be so stupid as I'd only been off the pill about 6 weeks then, but then went ahead and bought one but didn't use it. A few days later, I was still feeling 'off' so I took the test to eliminate pregnancy before I went back to the doctors to see what might be wrong. I was incredibly shocked to see the positive result and when I took the clearblue test the following day it estimated I was approx 5 weeks.

Not only had I managed to conceive with PCOS, I had fallen pregnant our first month of trying and whilst overweight (medically). I did take 2 supplements to help with my health at the time and to improve my chances so whether they had any impact I don't know - they were Agnus Castus and Boots Chromium Women's Supplements (I had read that Chromium and Agnus Castus supplements were good for fertility) - I can't claim they are responsible and I have no way of knowing if they did make a difference. It could have been the 1 stone weight loss but either way I was pregnant.

Final Thought

All sufferers of PCOS have the syndrome to a varying degree and I have read some awful stories about couple's struggles to conceive with the syndrome with whom I sympathise. I wrote this article because when I was researching the syndrome after my diagnosis there were so many sad stories and few happy ones and I more or less convinced myself that my experience would be difficult so I wanted to put this story out there to give others hope that not all those with PCOS do have fertility issues. 

I don't know what the future holds for myself, Cotswold Dad and I would like more children in the future and we may have a difficult experience conceiving next time but knowing I've conceived once with this condition and knowing that my cousin conceived twins naturally with the condition too does give me more hope and I hope it also gives some hope to those recently diagnosed with PCOS who may have landed on this page in their quest for more information.

Hi. *speaks nervously*

I'm Gemma, and I'm a bad parent.

"Hi Gemma" *spoken by a group of supportive parents*

I've failed in parenting because....

I am NOT a mind reader.

I don't know what he wants.

He can't tell me...yet. his vocabulary is currently limited to dog, miaow, yesssss, cheese, mama and dada so unless he wants a dog or cheese he can't tell me.

He points at things - I think he wants a drink (or is that just me), a toy, a brush, a book, but every time I offer him what I think he wants he shakes his head at me as if to say 'honestly mummy'

Sometimes he doesn't point or gesture at things he just looks at me as if I should just know what he wants.

And then when he doesn't get what he wants he pouts, his bottom lip trembles and I have less than 5 seconds to avoid a nuclear meltdown before we go into full tantrum mode with screaming, crying, tugging and the bit I hate the most the arching of his back and going stiff as a board.

I rarely get there in time and then once he starts there is no turning back - he started this and he is going all the way. So I do what I can - hold him, console him, sing to him, play with him - anything that works and if I'm very lucky he'll stop.

But I still haven't worked out what he wants.


Anyone got a crystal ball?

I recently stumbled across a forum on Mumsnet where a mum had posted that her husband found someone had left a baby in a car - what followed was an interesting discussion as to if it was acceptable to leave a baby in a car and if so how long for and in what conditions. You can read the thread for yourself here but it made me think about what I normally do and if it is acceptable.

The thing is that I do leave Cotswold Kid in the car whilst I pop out and do errands. If I'm getting petrol I try to choose a petrol station which has a glass window so that I can clearly see the car whilst I'm paying but this isn't always possible and I do sometimes use the ones where the view is obstructed.

I have left him asleep in a supermarket car park (like the one in the picture above) whilst I ran in and got a sandwich and a birthday card.

I've also left him in the car parked outside the post office whilst I sent a parcel.

I also once left him in a retail park whilst I went into Argos to pick up a reservation one weekday morning - but when I realised that I had a longer wait than I was expecting I went back and got him.

Of course the one thing that all the above occurrences had in common was the amount of time I was away. On every single occasion I expected to be in and out of the shop in less than 5 minutes and in most cases I was. As every parent knows, going out is like a military operation and in my head I was thinking that by the time I'd unstrapped CK, put together the travel system, strapped him in and grabbed his bag and then reversed the routine when returning, I could have probably been in and out several times.

Certainly when CK was a baby he would regularly fall asleep in the car and so wouldn't even know I was gone half the time and as I have tinted windows in the rear of my car people can't see in unless you stand in front of my car so you wouldn't even know he was in there.

Of course there have been the odd occasion when I've come back and found his face red with tears but that's the rarity. I think that now he is a toddler, he is used to going to the petrol station, knows he will be left but that I always come back so he doesn't often get upset and can quite often still see me whilst I'm paying anyway. Also with a lot of fuel stations having pay at pump this has meant that leaving him isn't a very regular occurrence - unless I'm popping in for a pint of milk.

I don't find the weather to be an issue - especially living in the UK but on the rare day that we do have some warmer weather I do leave a window open for him and if I think its dangerously hot then I do take him out.

So to sum up - I think it's acceptable to leave a baby or toddler in a car but for no more than 5 minutes and not in very hot weather - I certainly wouldn't leave him to go into the supermarket and do a weekly shop and I don't think he'd want me to either as he loves nothing more than sitting in the trolley when we go shopping .

It's just my opinion of course but what do you think? Let me know in the comments below.

Ever had one of those weeks when everything you touch seems to break?

It started with our baby steriliser, it originally belonged to my mum and dad and was used by them when they had me and my sister. They then passed it to us when we had Cotswold Kid and we still use it for storing and keeping bottles clean. We took it with us to Center Parcs but when we opened the car boot it fell out the car and hit the floor. I thought it was ok at the time but when we filled it in the lodge I realised it was leaking and had a crack in the bottom - that was the first thing that needed replacing.

Our run of bad luck seems to have been passed to another baby item, Ewan the Dream Sheep - the leg that plays the lullabies is playing up and doesn't always seem to work. I think there might be a loose connection and we have had a lot of use out of it (CK has slept with it almost every night and nap time since he was born) we even had it in the hospital so it was only a matter of time before it stopped working. The other legs seem ok and the lullaby leg does work occasionally but I think that sheep is on it's 'last leg' so to speak so we're are going to have to consider replacing it.

If the above wasn't bad enough, when I plugged CK's baby monitor in on our return from holiday it too started playing up. The monitor in his room won't turn on now and I think there is something wrong with the power cable so we will either have to replace the cable or the whole monitor.

I think we may have gremlin's -  but it is odd that all the items that have gone are baby products and they've all gone in the last week.

Anyone else ever experienced anything similar?

So you may have seen on a previous post that my family, some friends and I all visited Woburn Center Parcs for a midweek break. It's actually our second visit to Center Parcs as we all went to the one in Longleat last year and it was so good we decided to go away again but try a different park this time.

Accommodation 

We chose a 4 bedroom executive lodge which held 9 of us altogether - 1 nineteen month old and 8 adults and despite the large number of us, the lodge was comfortable and spacious with each bedroom having its own ensuite. The lodge was in the upside down style with 2 bedrooms, hall and storage room downstairs and the remaining 2 bedrooms, open plan living/kitchen/dining room upstairs. We also had a games room containing a pool table, board games, Xbox one, and tv and out the back a patio with built in barbecue and our very own sauna. 

Our toddler was well catered for and I was surprised to see that in addition to the 2 cots and high chairs provided there were also safety gates at the top and bottom of the stairs. (We wish we'd known before actually as we'd brought our own gate with us). So he could run around to his hearts content without getting into trouble, even onto the balcony as the wooden surround was high enough that he couldn't climb over. Also the space and design of the lodge meant there was plenty of space for all of Cotswold Kid's toys that we'd brought with us.

The parc

The parc seemed much smaller than Longleat. We brought our own bikes and baby trailer as they are pricey to hire (£30 per adult bike and £28 for baby trailer), but our lodge was located less than 5mins from the pool complex and 5mins to the plaza (activities and spa) and lake. So we didn't need to use the bikes except to travel to the outdoor activity centre (for archery, laser clay, Segway etc) or care trail. There is also no train at Woburn and there do seem to be more people on foot with pushchairs than we observed at Longleat. I'm not sure that I would bother with my bike if we came here again.

Woburn may be one of the new parks however it is not short of wildlife and we had our own resident squirrel - named 'Steve', the odd hare and tonnes of ducks everywhere. The ducks in particular were very tame and came right up to our patio doors for food but when we offered them lettuce they weren't keen and we didn't see them again.

Subtropical Swimming Paradise

The pool area was lovely with a lazy river, rapids, children's areas for toddlers and older children, plus slides for the older ones. We spent a lot of time in the wave pool and on the lazy river and the water temperature was very good particularly if you have a very young baby. Free water jackets were also available and whilst we had brought our own armbands it was good to know that they also had these jackets available too. From a safety point of view there were a lot of lifeguards scattered around so that was reassuring and there was plenty of warning before the waves started in the pool in case you wanted to get out.

The changing area was family friendly with family cubicles available with more space, some of which had nappy changing facilities (drop down tables and bins) which was helpful when getting the little ones changed. The wrist bands we were given on entry to the parc (your lodge key) also acted as a token for a locker if topped up and they also had points where if you had forgotten your locker number you could scan your wrist band and it would give you your locker number. Also by being able to register your card against the wristband meant you could buy snacks, gifts etc in the pool area without towing your wallet or purse around with you. (great idea but dangerous - it's far too easy to spend money here).

The Activities

Last year when we went to Longleat we struggled a bit to book activities as a lot of things were booked up already so this year we booked them in advance instead. We did Target Archery which was my favourite where you shoot at a target 25m away, a treasure trail where you follow clues around the park (this is more for those with kids) and laser clay shooting where you use a modified rifle to shoot at clay rings. I was awful at laser clay but the others in my group seemed good at it and certificates were handed to the top scorers and the same for archery. There are tons more activities - but it is simply impossible to do everything, and with CK requiring a 3 hour nap each afternoon this also reduced our availability to do activities.

Activity Den

We got quite a bit of usage from the activity den which ran the crèche and children's activities. On Tuesday CK and I participated in toddler sensory which included a singing activity with a parachute and free play in the crèche room with musical activities, puzzles, books, toys etc. - it was really lovely and a great introduction to the activity den.

On Wednesday whilst the adults took part in archery and laser clay shooting, CK was booked into the crèche and he spent three hours painting, reading, singing and doing puzzles. We were also given a little hand out at the end showing what he got up to during the session. Unfortunately CK was not very keen on joining in much and was quite withdrawn throughout. (So much so he didn't want to go back Thursday but that's another story) We think he was just maybe overwhelmed and out of his routine but we're glad he got some benefit from it the first day.

On Thursday after he refused to stay in the crèche, we were squeezed into Mucky Pups - messy play for toddlers. Painting, gluing, sticking, plastercine, drawing, and a sand box - it was great fun but very messy - highly recommend this too. CK is more creative than I thought. My only regret was that I didn't put on a bib too as he was still out of sorts and kept wanting me to pick him and kept clinging to my leg - result? a Cotswold Mummy covered in paint.

The Spa

The spa has become an annual tradition for me after my first ever visit last year. I didn't get to go around all the experience rooms but those I did go in, the volcano and ice rooms and the blossom rooms were lovely and I am told that the rest of the rooms were great too. I did enjoy a back, neck and shoulder massage with some lovely smelling oils including Frangipani and this was so relaxing I nearly fell asleep. I also had my first ever facial and I can still feel the effects of this several days later - I would definitely do this again too. I also learnt something for next time, as earlier in the week I tried to book a massage and it was fully booked but after my session in the spa ended early on the Thursday I was offered the value towards a treatment and there were massage appointments available. Apparently they have an extra therapist to cover sickness however if everyone is in then that therapist can do extra appointments so if you are unable to book in advance it is well worth contacting the spa on the day you want to see if any further appointments have opened up. It's well worth bearing in mind.


So my overall verdict?

I think this is a holiday you should fully plan in advance as the activities get quickly booked up, you can book some activities on site but to avoid disappointment you should book prior to going. It was also a fun holiday, with plenty to keep you entertained, fantastic facilities and a very child friendly parc. You can spend as little or as much as you like here and in our lodge we took food with us only shopping to top up essentials on the site (milk and bread) as the supermarkets on the parc are a little pricey. To keep the costs down, each couple in our lodge cooked one meal each night which worked really well and the only time we ate out was at the Pancake House on the final morning when we left - which was a lovely finish to the break.

Overall this was a great holiday, we had a lovely time despite the weather and I very much expect that we will return again next year. I highly recommend it to everyone.

What do you do when your 3 hour spa session gets interrupted by a toddler who won't settle in the crèche? 

It's our third day here at Center Parcs and I was so looking forward to my 3 hour spa session which was booked in for 9am today. Unfortunately things went a bit pear shaped.

Cotswold Kid was booked in the crèche for 9-12 but when we dropped him off he wasn't too happy to be left there and started crying. We went onto the spa which is in the same building anyway and I enjoyed the first few spa rooms when two members of staff found me and asked me to go to the crèche as CK still hadn't settled in. I walked over in a robe with the intention of settling him and heading back to the spa but when I got there he was in a bit of a state.

I calmed him down at settled him and then gave him back to a staff member to take him back in and that's when he started getting distressed. - my spa experience was clearly over and I'd wasted money on 2 activities - Or so I thought.

This was where the excellent customer service came into play that Center Parcs was renowned for.

Firstly, the activity den offered me a refund or 'exchange', and although many of the sessions were now booked they managed to squeeze CK and I onto 'Mucky Pups' - a messy play session for those 18 months up at 11.45. 

I went back to the spa with CK in buggy and he was allowed in and into the accessible changing room so I could get changed back into my day clothes. I then spoke to the staff there who were good enough to also offer me an exchange to the same value and booked me in for a massage in a newly available slot (they were fully booked when I'd earlier tried to book) at 13.00.

Result - a happy and after my massage, relaxed Cotswold Mum - this is what service should be and I've also now booked a facial for later.

It's day two of a 4 night break at Center Parcs Woburn and I'm shattered. I thought holidays were supposed to be relaxing and restful, but despite the luxurious large double bed I stayed in last night I only got about 2 hours sleep. The Reason? 'The Boy' as Cotswold Dad calls him.

Cotswold Kid (CK) usually has his own room, usually has an afternoon nap from about 2 and then usually sleeps through the night when we're at home. But we're not home. Yesterday we spent the day at Woburn Safari park and then we arrived at CP Woburn at about 4pm and we tried to get CK down for a nap but he was having none of it. We were the first of our group to arrive and so he could hear the others coming in and wanted to know what was going on, to the point of him standing in his cot, opening the bedroom curtains and watching our group and other passers by (and me and CD unpacking the car). He was over excited, in a strange unfamiliar place and then he was overtired so there was no chance of him sleeping then. After a while we gave up and let him join the rest of us upstairs in the main living area's where he played for a while and more or less ran riot.

We gave him his dinner (a heinz meal) which he didn't seem interested in, and then more or less finished off a modified fajita to himself. We then decided to break out the bedtime routine: Quiet time (story reading), a nice bath - with jacuzzi jets - a bottle and then bed. It worked and he went straight to sleep.

Now you may be wondering what I'm moaning about if CK went straight to sleep, problem was that when we went to bed at 11pm, we woke him up (epic fail!). I tried every device known to man to get that child back to sleep. I tried Ewan the dream sheep (successful approx 85% of the time), I sang to the kid, I rocked, I cuddled, I swayed, I rubbed his back - this works but destroys your arm after a while. Finally at around 2am I moved the cot right against my side of the bed, turned myself upside down to lie on my left side and then put my arm through the cot bars and rubbed his back, stroked his arm. It did the trick - the kid was finally asleep and it would have been great if he had remained so - but he didn't.

At 4am, I woke up to him crying, the room was really light - CP don't do black out curtains and he wanted to get up. We tried to mollify him for an hour or so but eventually after letting him in our bed we gave up at 6am and CD took him upstairs for cartoons, breakfast and a drink.

So where are we now? Well we took him swimming at the tropical paradise from 10-12 (he was exhausted by then) but then instead of feeding him and letting him sleep I took him to toddler sensory play with a group of 10 other sleep deprived parents and sat in a dark room singing songs and playing with toys. He was reluctant to play at first, but him being him, by the time we were ready to leave he'd settled in and was starting to enjoy himself. - After dragging him away through a crowd of kids crying out 'Rupert' - the teddy bears picnic activity apparently we came back to our lodge filled him with a cheese sandwich, squash and pom bears and sent him off to bed.

Hopefully we've hit the reset button on him now and he'll be ok (and we will get some sleep tonight) otherwise I shall be chucking him in the creche for the day tomorrow so I can catch up on my sleep.

What do you do when you have to choose between your dream job and your child?

I never expected to ever be in this position. I was content in my job, my routine worked, my hours were right for me and my family and everything was working at well. I was happy ticking along and I had no reason to want anything more. 

But then our manager emailed an internal vacancy to me and my team - a job as a training advisor training others in my (quite large) department. For years I've been interested in going in this direction but whenever the job had come up before I had never been in the right position, I either didn't have the appropriate experience/skills or I was about to go on maternity leave, the timing was never right.

Until now...

Before I go any further I just want to explain our current situation. I work Monday to Wednesday 9-5 (was formerly full time though) and have an hour commute each way. On Monday, Cotswold Kid (CK) goes to his granny's who lives 10 minutes up the road from me, on Tuesday Cotswold Dad (CD) looks after him and then on Wednesday my Mum who lives 10 minutes from my work place an hour south, looks after him.

I had some questions about the job, firstly whether flexitime was available, whether I could do it on a trial basis and return to my department if it didn't work out and lastly if I could work from my normal office on occasion (as the job would be based at our head office which is an hour north of me). Unfortunately the woman who was the contact was off for personal reasons so I didn't get a response to my email, and when I finally did on the closing date her answer was very vague. She would consider the points I raised. (very helpful!)

I went ahead and applied on the Friday via email and Monday lunchtime I got a phonecall inviting me to an interview. I used the opportunity to discuss my questions above, the most important was flexitime - but whilst I was told it was something they could look into I got the strong impression they were looking for someone full time. Regarding the trial basis - I was informed they wanted someone permanent, so that didn't sound too good. Also regarding the working from my own office - I was informed this would be possible but not on a regular basis. I accepted the interview invite but decided to have a proper think about it all.

My main issues:

1. My mum wouldn't be able to look after CK on a Wednesday and would not get to see him unless I took him to visit on a weekend.

2. I would have to get childcare 3 days a week

3. Where we live only has 1 nursery which is very expensive, if we could get him in

4. The job includes a payrise but the starting salary would not fully cover the cost of the childcare and I would also be worse off due to the fuel expenses for a further 2 days a week.

I had a chat with 'CD' but decided that at this time the job wasn't right for me. As I mentioned above the routine I have works and as my mother always said 'If it ain't broke don't fix it'. I emailed the contact the next day and withdrew my application and funnily enough I haven't regretted it at all, I don't feel any disappointment at all which only confirms that I made the right decision.

Maybe if the job comes up in the future when CK goes to school and if so I might apply for it then, but for now I'm happy as I am.

Have you ever been in this situation? What did you choose - please comment below.

Over the last few weeks, global media has gone crazy over 2 stories involving families. The first, the story of a young Japanese boy missing after being abandoned by his parents in bear infested woods as a punishment but who was found alive several days later. The second, the story of a 3 year old who slipped away from his family and jumped into a gorilla enclosure resulting in the death of the gorilla, Harambe. Both parents in each case are now facing potential negligence charges as the world looks on in judgement - in this post I ask is this a judgement too far?

If you ask anyone about either of the above 2 cases I'm sure they will have an opinion. I actually feel some sympathy for both families as I can appreciate how both situations could come about.

Yamato Tanooka
Let's take the story of the Japanese family, 7 year old Yamato Tanooka was punished by his parents for throwing stones at a car by being left behind in the woods. When they returned to collect him they were unable to find him.

I can understand where they were coming from, J is at that age where tantrums are part of daily life. If he can't do something and gets frustrated then he starts crying or screaming, throwing himself on the floor or arching his back in a fit of anger. Sometimes in these instances the most effective way of dealing with him is to make sure he is somewhere safe and then to walk away - into the next room or upstairs so that he is out of sight but I can still hear him. It gives me a break (particularly if I'm feeling tired or stressed), gives him a chance to let out all his frustrations, and then I feel like I'm in a better position to deal with him when I go back (normally once the screaming or crying has stopped or is reduced). Its a method I know quite a few parents use including my own mum. I remember my sister having a huge tantrum in the middle of a supermarket as a young child, throwing herself on the floor crying, screaming and beating her fists on the floor. When my mum's attempts to placate her didn't work she walked off with me, (going a few aisles's down) and then returned to my sister when she went quiet. 'Are you finished?' she asked, 'good now come on we have more shopping to get', and that was the end of that.

I also remember a health visitor giving me similar advice in J's colicky days when I was at the end of my tether - leave him in his cot to cry, go and take 5 minutes, get a drink etc. and then go back to him. So in a way what the Japanese parents did was just an extension of this - and maybe they went a little too far. However, with everything else that happened - him going missing, being feared dead, the time until he was found, and the involvement of the authorities in the search, is sufficient 'punishment' enough for their actions being a touch too extreme and I really don't think that negligence charges are necessary - this wasn't a child that was abandoned. Discipline is a sign of love and good parenting, the child wasn't abused or smacked, his parents weren't being cruel. If anything this was 'tough love', being cruel to be kind and ultimately bring up a child with good values who learns that he can't always get what he wants and what is wrong with that?

Isiah Gregg

A 3 year old boy went to the zoo in Cincinatti with his family, gave his mother the slip and somehow fell into a gorilla enclosure, resulting in the zookeepers shooting the gorilla to save the boy. It's another story which has been sensationalised by the press and everyone has an opinion which ultimately is that the gorilla should not have been killed. The finger has then been pointed at various people as to who is to blame including the zookeepers (as everyone is suddenly an expert on gorilla's and tranquilisers) and also at the parents - who surely are to blame (according to the media) for not watching the boy. 

With any story, it's very difficult to get the full picture as to what has recently happened. This woman was a mother to 4 and if she had all 4 with her I can understand how one might easily have given her the slip as she only has two hands. I struggle to hold onto J sometimes and he is our only child and this is even when I have both hands free. He is small, very quick and is also a bit of a clever clogs - he can open the safety gate and can walk up and down the stairs (given the opportunity) with no effort at all. He is also very tall and can climb up on things including the sofa, toybox, dog... to reach items out of reach (fruit is a current favourite). If I pop to the bathroom, go sort some washing, fetch a drink, sometimes I come back and find J has either broken through the safety gate and gone upstairs to the bathroom, or is leaning precariously on furniture trying to reach something he has decided he wants. 

From my reading of Isiah's story, he had been holding his mother's pocket when he let go and decided to climb into the gorilla's enclosure. Chances are if he is anything like my toddler, he acts first and thinks... well never to be honest so most likely by the time his mother realised he'd let go, it was probably too late to stop him and save him. I also think the mother's actions were brilliant, she immediately rang the emergency services and was trying to keep him calm - I don't think I would have been that calm. As for the parenting technique of holding his mother's pocket - I have seen other parents do similar things, with children holding onto pushchairs or holding a parents hand so I don't think there's anything wrong with it and it is most likely a technique she has used regularly otherwise why would she continue to use it.

For me the problem wasn't an issue of parenting, but more how did the child get into the enclosure in the first place? Surely the zoo should have had a proper system in place to stop anyone getting into the enclosure in the first place and how could a small child have gotten in so easily with such minimal effort. The parents have said that they aren't going to sue the zoo but now that they are facing possible charges of negligence and are receiving death threats and the backlash of social media, I wonder if this is still the case. They have been through a terrible time having nearly lost their son, yes a gorilla died and that's sad but the issue shouldn't be the style of parenting but how this kind of accident could happen in this day and age.  I also think the police should be interviewing the zoo and checking their policies etc. and not hounding this family who have been through an awful experience.

It'll be interesting how both cases progress going forward - but I really hope the charges get dropped and these families can resume business as normal. It would be wrong for one mistake to destroy their lives for good. I guess we'll have to see.